31. At what time in your recent past have you felt most passionate and alive?
No doubt in my mind: when I was on my cruise. How could you not feel alive while waking up surrounded by the ocean, the budding excitement of visiting different countries and doing incredible adventures in them, of having your fill of relaxation and busyness? It was such an amazing five days for me and all my mom and I can talk about is when we’re going again. Cruising will definitely be an annual thing for us.
32. If not now, then when?
If I ever got a tattoo, this would be the perfect one for me. I feel like I’m constantly asking myself this question. And I constantly have an answer for myself. At first, it was school. Now, it’s finding a job. And once I find a job? I know I’ll come up with something else: I’m trying to figure out my finances first. I need to focus on my career. Blah, blah, blah. I’m pretty much a Professional Excuse Maker and the time has come to say: Now. Now is the time. Now is the time when I will put my whole heart on the line to find love. Now is the time I will shed all my previous notions and lose the weight for good. Now is the time I will stop making excuse and start doing.
33. If you haven’t achieved it yet, what do you have to lose?
Failure. The thing about not achieving something is that you don’t have to risk failure. And failure is something that I fear the most. I took timid steps to showing my fiction to mediocre reviews, which I think is why I’ve put fiction on the backburner again. I’m so afraid at failing at something I’ve wanted for my entire life that it’s just easier to not even try.
It’s a terrible attitude to have, but I try to be as honest as I can be on this blog and there you have it. Yes, not even trying is sometimes worse than failing but but not trying, I don’t know the taste of failure. But I also don’t know the taste of achievement.
34. Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever?
So, this is kind of a weird question but I think I understand it. These times happen infrequently and only with people I know well. Well well. People who I can talk about matters of the heart, but also know my sarcasm that a single barb doesn’t make them flinch. It happens with my best friend from work. It happens with my mom. It happens with my brother. It’s just about knowing them, backwards and forwards. Knowing when they need a minute to themselves, when they need a hug, when a joke will make them feel better. Knowing when to talk and when to be silent.
35. Why do religions that support love cause so many wars?
I can’t answer this question. Honestly, aside from the basics, I know very little about the politics that went into all the different wars. This question does make me a little itchy, though. If anyone cares to enlighten me, feel free!