Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Battling With the Stress Demon

I haven't wanted to admit it. First of all, I don't like to complain. (Unless it's about how much I don't want to exercise.) Secondly, I don't want to be a Debbie Downer. But, after 4 weeks of classes, it's finally hit me: Stress.

Stress + Stephany = Crabby Pants.

I don't deal with stress well. I get crabby, short with people, and consume my body weight in chocolate. I'm really scared of what I'm going to be like around November, when the tough projects come rolling in. (Hello, case studies.)

I've never worked a part-time job while going full-time at school. Actually, scratch that because I did work in my school's bookstore at the end of 2006, beginning of 2007. But I only worked maybe 10 hours a week and was taking easy-as-pie education classes.

I'm working 30 hours a week. My alarm goes off at 5:15 a.m. Monday through Friday. After class, four days a week, I rush to campus where I try to stay awake to listen to boring exciting lectures. On Mondays, I get a semblence of a break until I have to sit at my computer from 7 p.m. until 8:45 p.m., logging onto my online class' Virtual Classroom. Then come Tuesdays, my longest day. I have work, afternoon class, a break, and then class from 6 p.m. until 9 p.m. And it's not even a fun class. (Although, it could be. They just choose to be boring about it.)

Luckily, my week gets better starting on Wednesday. I'm done with work/classes by 3:15 p.m., which is heavenly. And I usually don't start any homework until Friday night, at the earliest. (Yes, I do homework on Friday nights. You can see how extremely exciting my life is.) But this means my nights are usually free for me to bum around online, watch lots o' TV, and catch up on my reading.

It's a busy schedule. I wouldn't say I'm at the level I was at during my "final" internship in fall 2008, but I'm getting there. And, really, it's not half as bad as many people. I live with my mom, which means I don't have too many responsibilities. I don't have any children to care for. And most of my nights are free for me.

So why am I so stressed out? My mom and I have gotten in more small arguments in the past 3 days than we have all year! I've come up with a list (because who doesn't love a good list?):
  1. I'm sleepy - I've been going to bed way too late for someone who has to be up at 5:15 a.m. The past 3 days, I've gone to bed past 11:30, which means I'm getting less than 6 hours of sleep. And I'm a 9+-hours-of-sleep-a-night type of girl. I don't function well when I'm exhausted.
  2. We're moving - Our lease for this amazing-yet-way-too-expensive apartment is up October 15, so we've already put a deposit on another apartment, closer to my school and my mom's work. But we put our deposit in very early so we haven't exactly secured an apartment yet. I'm a little anxious about that and don't relish the thought of yet another move. (This will be my 14th move. And no, I wasn't a military brat.)
  3. Flab to fab - It hasn't been working out as brilliantly as I had hoped. I don't want to get too in depth, since I'll be blogging about it tomorrow, but I'm getting really disappointed in myself. I've been feeling that I'm destined to be fat. (Lane I come!)
All of the issues, combined with my classes, projects, and work (which can be a VERY stressful job on most days), have gotten me to this point. Blogging about it has helped. I started this blog, not knowing I would find out why I am stressed. And now it's just a matter of moving forward, making changes, and battling with the stress demon.
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