Book Review: Cinderella Ate My Daughter by Peggy Orenstein

Cinderella Ate My Daughter
Author: Peggy Orenstein
5 of 5 stars

Goodreads Review:

The acclaimed author of the groundbreaking bestseller Schoolgirls reveals the dark side of pink and pretty: the rise of the girlie-girl, she warns, is not that innocent.

Pink and pretty or predatory and hardened, sexualized girlhood influences our daughters from infancy onward, telling them that how a girl looks matters more than who she is. Somewhere between the exhilarating rise of Girl Power in the 1990s and today, the pursuit of physical perfection has been recast as a source—the source—of female empowerment. And commercialization has spread the message faster and farther, reaching girls at ever-younger ages.

But, realistically, how many times can you say no when your daughter begs for a pint-size wedding gown or the latest Hannah Montana CD? And how dangerous is pink and pretty anyway—especially given girls' successes in the classroom and on the playing field? Being a princess is just make-believe, after all; eventually they grow out of it. Or do they? Does playing Cinderella shield girls from early sexualization—or prime them for it? Could today's little princess become tomorrow's sexting teen? And what if she does? Would that make her in charge of her sexuality—or an unwitting captive to it?

Those questions hit home with Peggy Orenstein, so she went sleuthing. She visited Disneyland and the international toy fair, trolled American Girl Place and Pottery Barn Kids, and met beauty pageant parents with preschoolers tricked out like Vegas showgirls. She dissected the science, created an online avatar, and parsed the original fairy tales. The stakes turn out to be higher than she—or we—ever imagined: nothing less than the health, development, and futures of our girls. From premature sexualization to the risk of depression to rising rates of narcissism, the potential negative impact of this new girlie-girl culture is undeniable—yet armed with awareness and recognition, parents can effectively counterbalance its influence in their daughters' lives.

Cinderella Ate My Daughter is a must-read for anyone who cares about girls, and for parents helping their daughters navigate the rocky road to adulthood.

My Review:

I should preface my review by saying I am not a mother and I am nowhere close to becoming a mother anytime soon. But I am a woman and I was quite interested in what this book was all about. I grew up in the 90’s and had a collection of Barbies (Veterinarian Barbie was my favorite!), as well as an entire suitcase filled with Barbie clothes, shoes, and accessories. I was loved the Disney princesses, but especially had a soft spot for Belle and Pocahontas. I never held Barbie (or any of the Disney princesses, for that matter) up to some ideal I needed to get to. They were just toys to play with. That’s it. That’s all. I am not a feminist and I squeal over little pink baby clothes and adorable tutus.

I don’t know what I expected to get out of this book but the subject matter was intriguing. Peggy Orenstein left no stone unturned in her quest to discover the history behind this girlie-girl culture and what affect it is really having on girls today. The chapters were vast and chock-full of information and Orenstein’s own personal stories. She tells of her own struggles trying to raise a daughter in a world consumed by Hannah Montana and princesses. She dissected the pageant scene, Disney stars (such as Miley Cyrus, Hilary Duff, and Christina Aguilera in an appropriately titled chapter “From Wholesome to Whoresome”), the rise of Barbie and Bratz Dolls, and the truth behind fairy tells, just to name a few of the topics.

I thoroughly enjoyed Orenstein’s writing style and all the research she put into this book. (She went to a Miley Cyrus concert. That? Is dedication.) She was hard-hitting but backed up everything she said with honest and true facts. And she even let the reader into her own life, documenting problems that had arisen with her own daughter and how she handled them. (And she didn’t put herself on a pedestal as the way all mothers with daughters should solve problems. She had many tug-of-wars with her daughter and she freely admits she didn’t always act in the right way.) I’m not one to say a non-fiction book is a page-turner, but this one most certainly was. I couldn’t get enough of it!

What I learned most of all is that it’s not enough to keep girls away from this new rising culture, but it’s also not enough to give into their every whim to be the “cool mom”. There is a balance that takes place and discussions that need to happen. Raising daughters in this day and age can be an exhausting task, with the way the online world has exploded (“35 million kids ages three to eighteen-80 percent of kindergarteners alone-are online”, pg. 160), the way Disney princesses have now morphed into beautiful girls filling TV screens (and radios and magazines), and the way marketers are now aiming their sights on kids younger and younger these days. This is a book I think every woman needs to read because I was appalled by some of the facts represented. Orenstein is not talking simply about the “inherent evil” in just Barbie dolls and Disney princesses, but that we need to be aware of what is out there. And it’s not pretty.

I’ll finish this (extremely long!) book review with some quotes:

“...so does the path that encourages them to equate identity with image, self-expression with appearance, femininity with performance, pleasure with pleasing, and sexuality with sexualization.” (p. 8)

“[Disney] princesses avoid female bonding. Their goals are to be saved by a prince, get married,..., and be taken care of for the rest of their lives. Their value derives largely from their appearance. They are rabid materialists.” (p. 23)

“...like pink products all along the age span that urge girls to “be yourself,” “celebrate you,” “express yourself,” they define individuality entirely through appearance and consumption.” (p. 50)

“In 2009, twelve thousand Botox injections were given to children between the ages of thirteen and nineteen. In 2008, forty-three thousand children under the age of eighteen surgically altered their appearance.” (p. 206)

What is your opinion of the “girlie-girl” phenomenon? Do you think it’s harming girls today? What was your experience with Barbie and Disney princesses?

I received this book for free from TLC Book Tours in exchange for an honest review. All words and opinions, unless otherwise stated, are my own.

What I’m Reading - the February Edition

The Marriage Plot
Author: Jeffrey Eugenides
4 of 5 stars

This was the January book pick for #twookclub. At first, I was excited to read it because I had heard nothing but rave reviews. It was the book I voted for. And then, I started hearing more and more people talk about it. How it was slow and boring. How the characters, especially Maddy, were annoying. Some people even gave up on the book before finishing. So I opened the book with a lot of apprehension. The book was not an easy read, but I can surely shelve it as one of the best books I've ever read. The characters were dynamic and interesting, the plot was intriguing, and the themes were compelling. There was something about each main character - Maddy, Leonard, and Mitchell - that called to me. I loved them all and feel like it so accurately depicted the life of a 20something college graduate and all the mistakes and experiences they go through. I absolutely adored Eugenides writing style. And it made for a great, honest discussion during our #twookclub chat. I'm so grateful for all of you who made it to the chat!

 

What Happened to Goodbye
Author: Sarah Dessen
5 of 5 stars

Mclean Sweet is a 17-year-old girl who had her world rocked when her parents announced they were getting a divorce. Her mom was leaving her father to marry the coach of her father's favorite basketball team. And her mom was pregnant with the coach's twins at the time. Not being able to handle a completely new relationship with her mom, her new stepfather, and twin babies, Mclean decided to move in with her father. It was a hard decision but the right one to make at the time. Mclean and her father, a restaurant consultant, moved around a lot in the next 3 years as he traveled to city to city wherever the restaurant he was consulting at needed him. In each new city, she developed a new persona and a new name. It was her way of coping but it wasn't until she started in the town the book took place in that she discovered how damaging these personas could be. In this new town, she didn't have a chance to be someone new. In this town, she was Mclean. Mclean who found a group of friends who liked her just as she was, even if her life was pretty messed-up. It was a story about friendship and family, and how desperately we need both. With each new Sarah Dessen book I read, I find another character I connect with and love. Her characters have so much depth and life to them that I can see myself in them. There is something about the way Dessen crafts plots and characters that draws you in from the first page and leaves you sad when you finish, as if you just had to leave behind some of your best friends. Another beautifully written story and one I completely recommend.

 

Cover Me
Author: Catherine Mann
4 of 5 stars

I'll admit: military-driven romances are my guilty pleasure. If you find a great author, these books can seem so authentic and real, the characters tangible and the books incredibly difficult to put down. Catherine Mann is one of those authors (Suzanne Brockmann and Cindy Gerard are two other I wholly recommend). The series of hers I'm reading through now follows the lives of pararescuemen, which is a branch of the military I've never read about before. This book followed the lives of Wade Rocha and Sunny Foster. Wade is a PJ who jumps out of a plane to rescue Sunny, a guide and a lady who knows her way around the Alaskan territory. The book is action-packed from the first sentence to the last as Sunny and Wade uncover a murder plot and try to find out who is behind the serial murders happening in her small, cut-off-from-the-world town. Their romance is sizzling (and believable!). The character development is spot on. And while this isn't a whodunit type of book, it was still a thriller to see how it all unfolded.

What is your guilty pleasure when it comes to reading? If you read The Marriage Plot for #twookclub (or for your own reading pleasure!), what did you think of it?

Book Review: Night Swim by Jessica Keener

Title: Night Swim
Author: Jessica Keener
Published: 2012
Rating: 3 of 5 stars

Review from Goodreads: Sixteen-year-old Sarah Kunitz lives in a posh, suburban world of 1970 Boston. From the outside, her parents’ lifestyle appears enviable – a world defined by cocktail parties, expensive cars, and live-in maids to care for their children – but inside their five-bedroom house, all is not well for the Kunitz family. Coming home from school, Sarah finds her well-dressed, pill-popping mother lying disheveled on their living room couch. At night, to escape their parents’ arguments, Sarah and her oldest brother, Peter, find solace in music, while her two younger brothers retreat to their rooms and imaginary lives. Any vestige of decorum and stability drains away when their mother dies in a car crash one terrible winter day. Soon after, their father, a self-absorbed, bombastic professor begins an affair with a younger colleague. Sarah, aggrieved, dives into two summer romances that lead to unforeseen consequences. In a story that will make you laugh and cry, Night Swim shows how a family, bound by heartache, learns to love again.

My review:

This book started off really slow for me. It took me a while to really dig into the book and feel the flow of Keener’s writing. It felt very disconnected at the start and I didn’t feel like I understood who Sarah was.

But then Sarah’s mother died. And then the story really picked up. This is when the dysfunctional family fell apart. When Sarah started making some really bad decisions that I didn’t quite agree with. When her big brother left home to pursue a music career, when her father began dating someone much younger than him, and when Sarah begins to experience with life itself. I felt that this was the moment I could finally feel her character and who she was.

This wasn’t a fluffy, silly novel. Keener hit readers hard with issues of sex, drugs, and death and how all three affects you, no matter your age. It’s about a girl who has had her entire world turned upside down and is scrambling to figure out where she fits in the mess that remains. The cover of the book itself was stunning and the writing began to tug at my soul as I became more entrenched in Sarah’s life and the decisions she was making.

Ultimately, it was a book with hard themes that were a little difficult to read about at times but a book with raw and honest writing. While it had a clean, albeit predictable ending, it also felt very honest and I ended the book with a tiny smile on my face, knowing Sarah and the Kunitz family were going to be all right.

And the author has also generously agreed to give away one copy of the book to one of my readers! Leave a comment on this post to be entered in the giveaway. Giveaway ends Wednesday, February 1 at midnight and I’ll announce the winner on Thursday.

I received this book for free from TLC Book Tours in exchange for an honest review. All words and opinions, unless otherwise stated, are my own.

What I’m Reading - the January Edition

One of the things I’ve wanted to do more of with this blog are book reviews. I am a book worm by nature and read a lot but I don’t want this blog to become a book review blog. Instead, I’m testing out a different style of reviewing books. Three at a time, short snippets of what the books are about and my overall thoughts. We’ll see how this goes!

Anna and the French Kiss
Author: Stephanie Perkins
5 of 5 stars
Genre: YA lit

I loved this book. It has a silly title and maybe it has a silly premise, but this was one of my favorite books I’ve read in a really long time. Anna was a character I could connect with, even if she was 17. The plot completely drew me in and had me hooked from the get-go. It was about 17-year-old Anna whose father decided she needed to spend her senior year at a boarding school in Paris. She had to leave her entire life, including her “almost boyfriend”, best friend, and job at the movie theater. She arrived knowing nobody, not understanding French, and a complete stranger to Paris. But in the way books do, she immediately found a great group of friends to help her understand the country and have a home in a foreign place. And, of course, there was a boy. His name was St. Clair and what I enjoyed most about his character was that he was not a perfect male specimen. Romance novels have a tendency to place the male hero on a pedestel, perfect and faultless. It’s not reality and always leaves a bad taste in my mouth. St. Clair had an exuberence to life but also a long list of faults that made him even more adorable and most importantly, human. He also had a girlfriend. Throughout the book, you witness the love story between two teenagers who so badly want to be together but circumstances keep that from happening. As Anna begins to fall in love with St. Clair, she also begins to grow up - a lot. She has to discover how to be independent in a strange country and most importantly, true to herself, her beliefs, and her desires. As many of you are aware, I have mad love for romance novels. This one? It is the perfect teenage romance novel. It was witty and heartbreaking and while I expected to enjoy the story, I never expected for it to be such a page turner, something I couldn’t put down and couldn’t stop thinking about when I did. I was happy for the characters when it ended but also so very sad that their story was over and they wouldn’t be a huge part of my everyday life anymore. Completely, wholeheartedly recommend.

What Women Fear: Living in a Faith that Transforms
Author: Angie Smith
4 of 5 stars
Genre: Christian Non-Fiction

I’ll admit I have never read a single blog post that Angie has written, nor knew all too much about her before hearing about this book. But when I heard the title and read the description, I knew I had to read it. Fear and anxiety are something I struggle with on a daily basis and sometimes, it feels like I’m not fully trusting in God or fully a Christian because of this. This book was divided into chapters that delved into different fears we may have: fear of rejection, abandonment, and betrayel, fear of failure, fear of not being significant, fear of God’s plan for my life, fear that God isn’t real, to name a few that really struck a chord with me. Angie Smith has a powerful testimony and she hasn’t lived an easy, blameless life. She has struggled and has dealt with many of the issues talked about in this book. This made her words seem so much more meaningful and not idle chat. She didn’t seem to think any of these fears were silly or that doubting God’s existence made us less Christian. These are legitimate fears that the enemy is hard at work in our lives to make us believe. This book is something I can see myself re-reading, especially certain chapters, because it spoke directly to my heart and made me take a long, hard look at my fear and exactly who is the mastermind behind it all.

Favorite quote: “Here’s the part we need to cling to: If what we are being called to do is in God’s will for us, we truly can’t fail. I know it sounds like I’m making a flippant statement that should be on a poster with a guy hitting a golf ball, but what I mean is that we simply may not have the same meaning as God for the word “failure.” To me, failure means it doesn’t turn out the way I wanted it to. To God, it means I didn’t pick up the brush.” (pg. 68)

Summer of the Midnight Sun
Author: Tracie Peterson
4 of 5 stars
Genre: Historical Christian Fiction

I used to devour Tracie Peterson’s books when I was younger. Once I “graduated” from the YA section, these were the books I tended to stray to the most. She writes historical Christian novels, full of intrigue and excitement. This book was no different. I remembered reading about Jacob and Leah in previous books by the author but they were secondary characters. This books focused mainly on Leah and her estranged relationship with the love of her life, Jayce. After a ten-year separation, they find themselves together again and soon find themselves defending Jayce after he is accused of murder. They also have to contend with Pinkerton agent, Helaina, who is hellbent on getting Jayce to Seattle and seeking justice for his charges. Helaina was one character I didn’t care for in the least and I think the author intended it that way. I was so enamored with Jayce and the blossoming relationship between Leah and Jayce that her intrusion made me quite upset! I was hooked from the first page until the last, which left me hanging and hungry for the second in the series. There’s something about the way Peterson creates characters and plots that draws me in and I’m not sure why I took such a long break from her books.

Have you read any of the above books? If so, what were your thoughts? What is your idea of failure?

The Top 10 Books I Read in 2011

At the beginning of the year, I made a goal to read 60 books this year. (At first, I set the bar at 100 books but didn’t want to rush myself through the books I was reading so I knocked it down.) I have never kept track of how many books I read in a year so it was a measuring tool for me. Turns out, I really like to read. As of right now, I’m at 69 books read and am close to finishing my 70th.

I’m pretty darn impressed with myself.

Sure, not all of them were of high literary quality and the majority of the books I read this year were romance novels, but it’s what I like to read.

I’m still not sure I want to set another book goal this year, because I don’t want to rush myself through books. I want to set some book challenges, though, which is something I’ve been thinking about for a while. One challenge I’m setting for myself is to read one non-fiction book a month. That may be enough for me, or I may want to challenge myself to something else. We shall see.

But by the end of 2011, I will have read 70 books this year. Some of them stand out to me as fantastic reads I wholly recommend. And here is the list:

10. Just Between You and Me by Jenny B. Jones (4 of 5 stars)
A faith-based book about a girl who is still dealing with the drowning death of her mother when she was a teenager and trying to let go of her fears of love and loss. There’s a romance intertwined with the story and I seriously could not put this book down. When I was at work, I was thinking about it. When I was driving home, I was pondering what would happen next. And when I finished it, I found myself melancholy that it was over and these characters were not a daily part of my life anymore. That, for me, is the stamp of a great book.

9. Miss Fortune by Sara Mills (5 of 5 stars)
Another faith-based book, this time set in the 1940’s and a mystery. This tells the story about a woman private detective, still searching for her MIA fiance. She still loves him and knows in her heart he is alive. She teams up with FBI detective Jack who agrees to help her search for her fiance, in exchange for her help on a case. Full of action and adventure and a crazy ending that had me begging for more. (I did end up reading the second book which had another crazy ending, but haven’t heard any mention of a third. The second book was released in 2009, so I find it strange there hasn’t been the third yet when the ending clearly showed there would be one.)

8. Someone Like You by Sarah Dessen (5 of 5 stars)
I reviewed this one on my blog but this book was my introduction to the world of Sarah Dessen and I am hooked. She’s an amazing storyteller and this book had me gripped from the beginning. It’s a story about friendship, but also a story about finding your own way apart from the way people perceive you. Full review here.

7. American Wife by Curtis Sittenfeld (3 of 5 stars)
While I had some issues with this book, overall it was one of my best reads of 2011. Alice Lindgren was an utterly captivating character, someone I could closely identify with. (Well, until she became the First Lady!) I wrote an entire review of the book here.

6. Listen by Rene Gutteride (5 of 5 stars)
A thriller about a small town that gets hit with a website called Listen To Yourself, which puts private conversations between neighbors and families on a website for all to see. It brought up topics of censorship and whether you need to censor yourself in your own home, as well as the idea of how powerful words can be. Thoroughly enjoyed this novel and the twists and turns it took. And I honestly did not see the ending coming!

5. Good in Bed by Jennifer Weiner (5 of 5 stars)
I followed Jennifer Weiner on Twitter before I ever read a book by her. But I loved this one a lot and I really just love Weiner’s writing style. The main character was so likeable and I was rooting for her through the entire book. You can read my review of this book here.

4. The Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling
OK, cheating with this one but since every single one of these books would be on the list, it wouldn’t leave room for other books. I read this with a bunch of other bloggers for Summer of Harry which was an awesome experience. I had read the first two books when I was in middle school but it was Erin’s insistence that made me try them again. I am so glad I did. These books were amazing. The writing was fantastic and I couldn’t put these books down for anything. I’m pretty sure I’ll be making my way through these books again and again, but I’m still not over Fred’s death. It’s going to be a while.

3. Water For Elephants by Sara Gruen (4 of 5 stars)
This was the first book I read in 2011 and I loved it. It’s one of those books people either love or hate, because I’ve seen both sides. I enjoyed the story so much and it gripped me from beginning to end. Another one I reviewed on this blog. Find it here.

2. The Truth About Forever by Sarah Dessen (5 of 5 stars)
I could have sworn I had written a book review about this book but I did not, which is surprising as it was one of my favorite books this year. This is a YA-lit book about a girl named Macy who is still dealing with the unexpected death of her father. She has a boring job at the library and this summer, her boyfriend is going away. She ends up joining up with Wish Catering after meeting the group during an open house her mother had and found family and community. The love story between Macy and Wes was perfect and poignant and I loved every second of this book. It’s definitely one worth a read, and one I will be rereading again and again.

1. The Help by Katherin Stockett (5 of 5 stars)
I tried to write a review for this book after I had finished reading it but just couldn’t. It was one of those books that was so good and impacted me so much that I felt a review could not do it the justice it deserved. I actually watched the movie before reading the book and the movie was so darn fantastic that it made me itch to read the book. The book was even better. While I do think the movie is fantastic and stayed very true to the book itself, nothing compares to the written word in my opinion. I finished this book in late September and I still find myself missing the characters. Skeeter, Abilene, and Minnie are forever a part of my world and this is far and away one of the best books I have ever read. 

What were some of your favorite reads this year?

Book Review: Shiny Objects by James A. Roberts

***

Title: Shiny Objects
Author: James A. Roberts
Genre: Nonfiction
Year: 2011
Rating: 2 of 5 stars

***

Review from Goodreads:

In this cross between In Praise of Slowness and The Tipping Point,consumer behavior expert James A. Roberts takes us on a tour of America’s obsession with consumerism—pointing out its symptoms, diagnosing specific problems, and offering a series of groundbreaking solutions. Roberts offers practical, helpful advice for how to correct the materialistic trends in our lives, trends that lock us into a cycle of stress and financial hardship. A new The Paradox of Choice for the modern reader, Roberts’s Shiny Object is far more than a polemic against spending or a critique of capitalism—it’s an exploration of how we can learn to live happier, fuller, more productive lives today.

My review:

I could not get into this book at all. I was really excited about reading it because I loved the concept behind it. I’ve never been a materialistic sort of person. Money was something that was very limited during my childhood and watching my parents struggle with debt and money issues gave me the gumption I needed to make smart money decisions on my own. Materialism is not something that runs in my veins.

The voice of this book was very conversational and easy to understand. The author did a good job of moving the book along with his points and not spending too long on any one subject.

Ultimately, though, I could not connect with the message in this book. It’s one I believe in and hope I am doing my best to cultivate (being less materialistic, that is), but I don’t feel like I learned anything new about what materialism is, what it has done to our country (and around the world), or how to lessen the impact it has. I’m very curious as to who the target audience for this book is, because I felt as if it wasn’t a book targeted for twenty-somethings, though I believe this message is something a lot of twenty-somethings need to hear.

I was expecting a bigger impact from the message in this book, but it fell flat for me.

I received this book for free from TLC Book Tours in exchange for an honest review. All words and opinions are my own.

Book Review: Picture of Lies by C.C. Harrison

***

Title: Picture of Lies
Author: C.C. Harrison
Genre: Mystery
Year: 2011
Rating: 4 of 5 stars

***

From Amazon:

Investigative journalist Keegan Thomas has been living a nightmare of guilt and grief since her little girl, Daisy, was kidnapped practically in front of her eyes. When the police investigation stalled, she turned her grief to anger and buried herself in her work searching for missing children, her own included. The result was an award-winning series of articles on unsolved child abductions. Then came the inevitable burnout.

On what is supposed to be a working vacation, Keegan travels to Monument Valley on the Navajo Indian Reservation seeking the whereabouts of people in an old photograph found in her grandfather s belongings after his death.

But the Indians do not welcome this nosy stranger carrying a picture of their old people, some of them dead. While navigating the mysterious ways of the Navajo, Keegan is told one of the children in the photograph was kidnapped by missionaries and taken to a boarding school.

Keegan’s search for the child leads to a web of deception that stretches back two generations, and the truth Keegan learns about her own family is the most shocking betrayal of all. Nothing can prepare her for the danger she encounters when she becomes the target of a powerful U.S. senator who will do anything to stop her from telling what she knows about the Picture of Lies.

My review:

I devoured this book. I read the entire thing in three days. THREE DAYS! I never finish books in three days anymore. It was the perfect mix of mystery and romance. Of humor and seriousness. I’ve read enough mystery books to usually correctly guess who the bad guy will be, or what the ending will look like. But this book was full of twists and turns and surprises. I had no idea what would be happening next and gasped my way through it as mysteries were revealed.

I have to imagine mystery novels are hard to write, even harder to come up with original, strong plotlines but this book delivered on all accounts. The plot was solid and I kept wanting to learn more. And when all was revealed, it was a shock and something I wasn’t expecting.

The character development was good, too. I really enjoyed Harrison’s easy dialogue and way of writing. It all felt effortless and as if I really knew these characters. The romance part of the novel was more of a side story, not the main portion. But it felt more honest that way. Keegan’s main focus was on this mystery and also on finding out what happened to her daughter.

The only thing I didn’t enjoy as much was the ending, but I know it was an honest ending. (I’m just a sucker for everything tying up nicely at the end and not having to cry out, “NO! WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?” when I finish.) I don’t want to give away any part of the book but I can tell there will be a sequel to this one by the way it ended.

All in all, if mystery fiction with a little romance thrown in is your thing, this is a solid book to read. I would definitely, definitely recommend it.

Are you a sucker for an “everything-ties-together-nicely” ending, or do you like ones that surprise you? I would say I’m fifty-fifty on this.

I received this book for free from TLC Book Tours in exchange for an honest review. All words and opinions are my own.

Book Review: Good in Bed by Jennifer Weiner

***
Title: Good in Bed
Author: Jennifer Weiner
Genre: Chick-lit
Year: 2001
Rating: 5 of 5 stars
***

Summary from Goodreads:

For twenty-eight years, things have been tripping along nicely for Cannie Shapiro. Sure, her mother has come charging out of the closet, and her father has long since dropped out of her world. But she loves her friends, her rat terrier, Nifkin, and her job as pop culture reporter for The Philadelphia Examiner. She's even made a tenuous peace with her plus-size body.

But the day she opens up a national women's magazine and sees the words "Loving a Larger Woman" above her ex-boyfriend's byline, Cannie is plunged into misery...and the most amazing year of her life. From Philadelphia to Hollywood and back home again, she charts a new course for herself: mourning her losses, facing her past, and figuring out who she is and who she can become.

***

I connected with Cannie from the beginning. She was smart, sassy, vulnerable, and sensitive. I could relate to her from the get-go, especially considering she is dealing with the same father issues I deal with from this very day. This paragraph sealed it for me:

“But oh, when he loved me, when he put his hand on my head, when I leaned my own head against him...there was no feeling in the world that could beat it. I felt important. I felt cherished. And I would do whatever it took, press the bar until my hands bled, to get that feeling again.” (p. 98)

Every emotion I’ve ever experienced with my father leaving me? Right there.

This was the first book of Jennifer Weiner’s that I’ve read and I’m not sure why I stayed away so long. She is a fantastic writer and made me completely fall into the plot and the life of Cannie Shapiro. From reading the introduction, I knew this wasn’t going to be a story of a girl who loses weight, gets the guy, and takes down her ex-boyfriend. Jennifer Weiner set out to make this story something more relatable and real. And I could relate to Cannie in her insecurities about her body, the way she couldn’t seem to fully walk away from an ex-boyfriend who was no good for her, and in her family struggles.

The plot moved along quickly and there were so many twists and turns and surprises that I didn’t expect from a “chick lit” book. Characters were introduced that added so much to the plot and I couldn’t imagine Cannie’s life without. It wasn’t a clean, sweet story of triumph. Not at all. It was messy and gritty and raw. It was real. It made me take a step back and examine my own life. I laughed with Cannie, I cried with Cannie, I felt proud of her when she stood up to her ex-boyfriend, and utterly sad during the most heart-wrenching part of the book.

When you can make me feel a character’s emotions in my own life, then you’ve done your job as an author. I wholly recommend this book and it was such a great example of women’s fiction for an aspiring writer. I’ll leave you with some of my favorite quotes:

“When you’re on a battleground, you don’t have the luxury of time to dwell on the various historical factors and sociopolitical influences that caused the war. You just keep your head down and try to survive it, to shove the pages back in the book, close to the covers and pretend that nothing’s broken, nothing’s wrong.” (p. 106)

“Things happen, you know? That’s my one big lesson from therapy. Things happen, and you can’t make them unhappen. You don’t get do-overs, you can’t roll back the clock, and the only thing you can change, and the only thing it does any good to worry about, is how you let them affect you.” (p. 372)

Book Review: Willpower by Roy F. Baumeister and John Tierney

***

Title: Willpower
Author: Roy F. Baumeister & John Tierney
Genre: Self-help
Year: 2011
Rating: 4 of 5 stars

***

I was intrigued by the premise of this book. Willpower. I’ve told myself for years that I have very weak willpower. It’s limited presence shows itself in the way I struggle to lose weight, save money, mark off items on my to-do list. So I wanted to know about willpower. What it is, what it does for me, and how to strengthen mine.

A good chunk of this book was devoted to case studies and celebrity examples of what willpower looks like (and what it doesn’t). I wasn’t very impressed with it all, wondering how to apply the hundreds of case studies presented to my own life. Now, I love to read case studies. I find the human psyche incredibly complex and interesting. But it got a little too much for me, especially when life application was lacking.

The last part of the book (starting with Chapter 9) was when things started getting interesting for me. This was when I started seeing more life application. This is when I began to understand it all.

In the spirit of a self-help book, I’m taking a different approach to this book review. Instead, here is what I learned from this book:

1. We all possess a finite amount of willpower that gets depleted throughout the day. (p. 35)

2. For every task completed throughout the day, from forcing ourselves out of bed in the morning to not eating that second piece of chocolate after lunch, draws from the same stock of willpower. (p. 35)

3. “Whether you’re judging yourself or judging others, never equate being overweight with having weak willpower.” (p. 215)

4. The Oprah Paradox. Think about Oprah. She is hugely successful and she couldn’t have gotten to where she is without having exceedingly high self-control and willpower. Yet she struggles with losing weight (and keeping it off). Even people with high self-control can struggle with their weight. (p. 217)

5. It’s more important to heed the body’s internal cues than the external cues. When we diet, we start imposing more external rules on our body: when to eat, how much, etc. But it’s more important to listen to our bodies. Learn to recognize our hunger signals, and learn to recognize when we are full. (p. 223) This is something that Weight Watchers, in particular, heavily emphasizes. There was a pretty interesting study done on this very issue and it hit home the point of internal versus external cues.

6. When we start craving sweets, it’s more than just a matter of weak willpower. Our cravings have a “sound physiological basis”. Self-control depletes glucose and the fastest way to get that back? Eating sweets. It’s at this point that we need to reach for something more rich in protein and nutrients, even though reaching for chocolate is the more satisfying option. (p. 226 - 227)

7. “...people with high self-control consistently report less stress in their lives. They use their self-control not to get through crises but to avoid them. They give themselves enough time to finish a project; they take their car into the shop before it breaks down; they stay away from all-you-can-eat buffets. They play offense instead of defense.” (p. 239)

8. In the game of willpower, it’s the exertion of trying to make a decision that matters. Even if you end up giving in, it doesn’t automatically replenish your willpower stock, although it will help you from expending more willpower with this decision. (p. 244)

I found the book to be quite the interesting read, although it was really the last three chapters that spoke to me the most. The book is heavy on case studies and makes up about 90% of the book’s content. I enjoy reading studies so it wasn’t a big deal for me, but it did get a little too much at times. If you enjoy self-help, it’s a good read. And if the psyche into self-control and willpower interests you, I would definitely recommend this book.

I received this book for free from TLC Book Tours in exchange for an honest review. All words and opinions are my own.

Book Review: American Wife by Curtis Sittenfeld

***

Title: American Wife
Author: Curtis Sittenfeld
Genre: Fiction
Year: 2009
Rating: 3 of 5 stars

***

I should start off this book review by saying I’m always skeptical of how I will like a book that is wildly popular. All of my friends on Goodreads have rated American Wife 4 or 5 stars so I thought I would take a chance on the book. It had a good premise and I was intrigued by the fact that it was loosely based on the life of Laura Bush.

The beginning of this book was slow, the middle was fascinating, and the end was confusing. I know the beginning set up to show how Alice Lindgren would face the trials of the rest of her life, but it was very slow-moving for me but I kept reading, hoping it would get better. The middle of the book utterly captivated me. I loved reading about a more grown-up Alice, independent and sassy yet content to lead a quiet life - someone I closely identified with - and her romance with Charlie. The end of the book, about Alice and Charlie’s life as President and First Lady was very confusing for me. There were constant switches from the present day to the past and sometimes I could barely keep track. (It wasn’t until the end when I realized the present day had all taken place on ONE day.) It felt very chaotic for me.

The character development in this story was outstanding. I felt a kinship with Alice, relating to her quiet nature. I love the way Alice was written, as a quiet lady but also someone who has determination and morals. I absolutely loved Charlie and the way he loved his wife. He had major faults, none more apparent than when he was an alcoholic, but there always lied this playfulness and deep love for Alice and his daughter. Ellie stole my heart, along with Alice’s grandmother, and Charlie’s family. All the characters were alive and vibrant, with their own set of issues and problems.

The book gave a good, albeit fictional, glimpse into the life of a politician’s wife. Although the majority of the story focused on Alice’s past and there was only a small chunk devoted to life as First Lady, it was interesting to see how the wife of a controversial President reacts to situations. I’ve never been one to sit on my high horse and bash a President because I truly (maybe naively) believe they are doing the best job they can. They have the hardest job in the world and have to deal with so many situations I cannot even begin to think about. The First Lady is there to support her husband. She may not always agree with what he chooses, but she supports him because that’s what you do in a marriage.

I gave the book 3 stars because Goodread tells me that means I “liked it”. Four stars equals “really liked it” (which I didn’t). And 5 stars means I thought “it was amazing”. (Nope.) It was a good book with a good tone and voice. For me, it was very slow-moving in parts and there were a lot of scenes I thought didn’t exactly need to be there. I would still recommend this book, because I think the writing gives it the edge.

What were your thoughts on this book (if you’ve read it)?

Book Review: In Her Wake by Nancy Rappaport

***

Title: In Her Wake
Author: Nancy Rappaport
Genre: Memoir
Year: 2009
Rating: 3 of 5 stars

***

Nancy Rappaport was 4 years old when her mother committed suicide. Her parents were embroiled in a bitter custody battle at the time, with the courts siding with her father in the most recent battle before she killed herself. The story is about Rappaport trying to find closure in the death of her mom, seeking out anything to understand her mother’s mind and why she committed suicide. It is a mini-biography of her mom, her father, her family, and herself. It is a daughter trying to put together the pieces of her mother’s life.

For me, I never felt like I got a true picture of Nancy’s mother. I learned a lot about Nancy herself, her parenting styles, and how she and her siblings learned to cope without their mother. While there was exploration into her mother’s past and how she came to meet Nancy’s father and raise her children, there seemed to be more of an emphasis on how the family coped afterward. It makes sense, though, since the author was just four when her mother passed, but judging by the subtitle, I was expecting to have a clearer picture of her mother.

This was the type of story you would have to read in bits and pieces. The author’s writing style is very good and easy to read, but there is a lot of information to digest. It’s the type of book you have to read a little at a time, process, then pick up again in a few days. There was a lot of clinical information that I found interesting, but I imagine it just might be too much for some people.

In the end, it was a good book but I wouldn’t shelve it among my favorites. It tended to get very wordy in parts. If you’re a fan of non-fiction and memoirs, it’s a good pick for a book chock-full of anecdotes and information, especially involving suicide and how a family copes with the aftermath.

I received this book for free from TLC Book Tours in exchange for an honest review. All words and opinions are my own.

Book Review: Bossypants by Tina Fey

Title: Bossypants
Author: Tina Fey
Genre: Essays/Memoir
Year: 2011
Rating: 4 of 5 stars

Goodreads Synopsis:

In her acceptance speech for Mark Twain Prize for American Humor, Tina Fey announced that she was proud to make her home in "the 'not-real America'." It is perhaps that healthy sense of incongruity that makes the head writer, executive producer, and star of NBC's Emmy Award-winning 30 Rock such a cogent observer of the contemporary scene. Bossypants, her entertaining new memoir, shows that strangeness has been her constant companion. Fey's stories about her childhood in Upper Darby, Pennsylvania are only appetizers for LOL forays into her college disasters, honeymoon catastrophes, and Saturday Night Live shenanigans. Most funny read of the month; the best possible weekend update.

My Review:

To be honest, I expected a lot more from this book. More laughs, more anecdotes, more information. I knew it wasn’t a typical memoir-type book and it was more of a collection of essays by Tina Fey, but I had heard some amazing reviews about this book. I expected to laugh my way through it and want to give Tina a great big hug when I finished.

Tina Fey is a great writer and held my attention through most of the book. She has a quirky, self-deprecating sense of humor that shines throughout this book. Since I haven’t followed her career, don’t particularly care for 30 Rock, and the only Saturday Night Live episode I’ve ever watched was the one with Peyton Manning... it might seem a bit off that I chose to read this book. But I love Tina Fey. I love her character on 30 Rock and think she has done amazing things for women comediennes.

The book was good. It was full of essays ranging from her childhood to her beginnings of comedy to how she started 30 Rock. She details how she came to parody Sarah Palin and gives this totally awesome picture into motherhood, which had to be one of my favorite chapters of the whole book. Her writing style is off-beat but relatable.

The book wasn’t all good, though. There were some chapters that rubbed me the wrong way. Her chapter replying to certain comments made about her on celebrity gossip websites was distasteful. I understand Fey’s humor, but I didn’t find her replies all that funny. Just stupid. I’m not sure what to make of the chapter about her cruise, it seemed a bit rambling and misplaced. Sometimes, her self-deprecating humor became too much, bordering on “woe is me”. I’m sorry, but I fail to find any sympathy in a show like 30 Rock that has won an incredible amount of awards. I’m not going to cry with you that it took viewers longer to attach to the show, although critics have always raved it. Maybe it’s because I’m not a fan of the show myself, but it got too much at times.

In the end, though, I marked this book four stars out of five, because Tina Fey has a gifted way with words. While I didn’t laugh my pants off while reading this book, it was a humorous take on her life and the life of a comedienne. I’m just not as in love with it as other people were.

If you’ve read Bossypants, what did you think? If not, do you think you would read it? What’s your opinion of Tina Fey?

Book Review: Redemption by Karen Kingsbury and Gary Smalley

Title: Redemption
Author: Karen Kingsbury; Gary Smalley
Genre: Christian Fiction
Year: 2002
Rating: 4 of 5 stars

This is my second time reading this book, my first time a year or two ago. I want to read the rest of the Baxter series, which is extensive and knew I needed to reread this book. The story was a heartbreaking one: Kari finds out her husband, whom she loves very much, is cheating on her. Soon after, she finds out that she’s pregnant with their first child. Her husband wants a divorce, Kari is committed to her husband and her marriage and wants to make it work.

One of the themes in this book was a line Kari continuously said: Love is a decision. It’s absolutely true. So many people feel like love is an emotion, love is about feeling good and being happy. It’s not. You have to make the decision to love people, through the ups and the downs. Through the cheating. While I think cheating is one of those absolutes, it’s inspiring (well, as inspiring as a fictional character can be!) to see how committed Kari was to her marriage and loving him, through this awful circumstance.

The story also introduced you to Ryan Taylor, who was Kari’s best friend and first boyfriend in high school. They had a strong connection (and still do) and he comes back into town around the moment Kari finds out about her husband. They are reunited and while Kari tries to deny any feelings she still has for him, she knows he is Ryan Taylor: her first love and the one she never stopped loving.

One of the biggest complaints people have against the book is that there is too much religion. And sure, it is a Christian book and more heavy on Christianity than most books out there but that’s what makes this book so great. So many Christian authors are trying to become too mainstream with their fiction where faith takes a backseat to the main story. In some books, it’s barely even addressed. So I like that Kingsbury inserted so much faith into this novel. It wasn’t preachy, but it was simple, solid, back to the basics faith.

While the story did seem to become clinical in some parts and felt more that the authors were reciting from a training manual than actually writing a fiction novel, it was still a very well-written book. It followed Kari’s journey of fighting for her marriage and holding tight to God even when she didn’t understand what was happening. And it followed the story of a man who has hit rock bottom, who strayed so far from the faith that was so true to him that he became a person he barely recognized.

It’s the story of redemption, and how God can take a situation that seems so heartbreaking and use it for good.

What are your thoughts on the phrase: Love is a decision?

Book Review: The Shelter of God’s Promises by Sheila Walsh

  Title: The Shelter of God’s Promises 
  Author: Sheila Walsh
  Genre: Christian Non-Fiction
  Year: 2011
  Acquired: Through Booksneeze, in exchange for a fair review
  Rating: 5 of 5 stars
***


From Goodreads:
In a world of uncertainty, pain, and struggle, where do you find solid assurance and unshakeable truth?
Gifted Bible teacher and inspiring Women of Faith speaker Sheila Walsh offers powerful, heart-filled teaching on ten bedrock promises of God, providing the foundation for daily confidence, joy, and hope.

In The Shelter of God's Promises, Sheila searches Scripture for what God has promised us, what God's promises mean, and how encounters with Christ are the eternal fulfillment of His unrelenting commitment to us. In this riveting walk through some of the Bible's most compelling stories, Walsh unveils ten foundational promises of God that secure our lives during even the most difficult times. Sheila weaves her hallmark storytelling, inspiring personal experience, and Scripture to help readers gain a trust in God that will sustain them for a lifetime.

My Review:


I chose to review this book because my faith lately has been very stagnant. I still believe and I’m still attending church, but that’s about it. I don’t open my Bible regularly and only think of praying when I need something, so then I feel bad about only going to God when I need him to do something for me that I just have cut off all communication between the two of us. I want that fire back. I want to remember why I believe. This book, by one of my favorite women of God, had an intriguing title that I thought was worth checking out.
Throughout the entire book, Walsh weaves in stories from her own life and stories from the days when Jesus walked the earth to paint a picture of God’s promises. What He promises. Why He promises. And how He is bringing those problems to fruition, even when we feel like He’s working against us. A lot of the book centered upon the question: Why do bad things happen to good people? Why do we have to struggle so much? It’s a question that I ask again and again, especially as it relates to everything that’s been heaped upon my grandparent’s plates lately. They are two of the Godliest people I know, who never seem to falter in their faith…yet God is bringing them through some major valleys.

The answers lie in God’s promises. He never promised us we would have an easy life. It reminds me of a song by Britt Nicole where she sings: “You never said this road would be easy, but You said that You would never leave. And You never promised that this life wasn’t hard, but You promised to take care of me.” So incredibly true. God knows of our troubles, He already has a plan to take care of them. This isn’t something He is ever surprised by. He is always working to create good out of our troubles. And we have hope, incredible, lasting hope, that He will see us through our bad times and be there to walk us through those easy times, as well.

If you’re struggling with your faith, struggling as to why you believe or why you’re dealing with such hardship, pick up this book. It will show you why.

And, in closing, I want to share my favorite quote from the book:

"Jesus doesn't give us what we believe we need. He gives us what He knows we need, and He gives it out of love for us, deep, undeniable love."

Disclosure of Material Connection: I received this book free from the publisher through the BookSneeze.com book review bloggers program. I was not required to write a positive review. The opinions I have expressed are my own. I am diclosing this in accordance with the Federal Trade Commission's 16 CFR, Part 255: "Guides Concerning the Use of Endorsements and Testimonials in Advertising".

Book Review: You Don’t Love This Man by Dan DeWeese

  Title: You Don’t Love This Man
  Author: Dan DeWeese
  Genre: Fiction
  Year: 2011
  Acquired: Through TLC Book Tours, in exchange for an honest review
  Rating: 4 of 5 stars

  *I stole this above idea from Kathleen’s blog.






From Goodreads:
A novel about fatherhood, marriage . . . and bank robbery.
On the morning of his daughter Miranda's wedding, Paul learns that the bank he manages has been robbed—apparently by the same man who robbed it twenty-five years before. As if that weren't enough, Miranda, who is set to marry Paul's former best friend—a man twice her age—seems to have gone missing.

Struggling to reconcile his little girl with the grown woman he's about to walk down the aisle (if he can find her), to accept his onetime peer as his future son-in-law, and to comprehend the strange coincidence of being robbed by the same man two decades apart, Paul takes stock of everything leading up to this moment—as he attempts to navigate the day's many surprises while questioning the motives and choices of those around him.

My review:


I’ll admit, it took me a while to get into this book. I don’t read too many books from a male character’s point of view and it was hard to connect to Paul at first. He seemed a little self-centered and self-righteous, especially in dealing with his female co-workers. Gradually, as the story progressed, I began to absolutely fall in love with every part of this book. I grew to love Paul’s character, as a father who just wants what’s best for his daughter. He’s stuck in a cycle of mediocrity, divorced with an adult child and a lackluster career. As the book follows him through this day of dealing with a bank robbery and trying to find his daughter, he begins to reflect on how he got here -- from his career to his divorced status to befriending this guy his daughter is now marrying.

As I got used to the writing style and the dynamics between present-day and the past, I couldn’t put this book down. There was a powerful message hidden beneath the cover. While it was hard to relate to some aspects as I’m younger and female, there was an underlying message of life. It is what you make of it and past experiences can shape your tomorrow. It’s cliché, but it’s also incredibly true. Paul is discovering how silent he has been throughout his life and this is the first time he’s really stood up for what he believes in and wants.
I would recommend this book for anyone in search of a great book that stretches the bounds of regular fiction. It’s a book for someone searching to read something with a bigger, deeper meaning. For me, being 23 and on the verge of graduating from college and really beginning my adult life, it was a different perspective and view on things. It’s a book about fatherhood, it’s a book about life, and it’s a book about acknowledging the choices we’ve made and moving on from them.

Someone Like You by Sarah Dessen

Someone Like You by Sarah Dessen was a book about friendship and coming into your own. It focused on 15-year-old Halley, whose best friend, Scarlett, finds out her boyfriend, Michael, had been killed in a motorcycle accident. They had only been dating for a few weeks but she later finds out that she is pregnant with his baby. Halley becomes focused on helping Scarlett through this, especially with all the other girls in high school Michael had dated, crying over his loss. Halley also finds a new (and exciting) friend in Michael’s best friend, Macon. They begin dating, even though they are as different as night and day. Through all of this, she begins pulling away from her parents and sticking close to her friends and boyfriend.

I don’t want to give the story away, so that’s the gist of it. I haven’t read YA fiction in a really long time, so I wasn’t sure how I would like the story but I loved it. Dessen has this amazing voice throughout the entire book and the characters are so well developed. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, the plot flowed along smoothly, and it was real.

There were a lot of issues brought up in the book: virginity, sex, love, friendship, rebellion, drinking, drugs, parents, teenage pregnancy. And I have to say that Dessen did an awesome job covering them without going too over the top, or being too preachy. It was a little hard for me to read because I have cousins the same age as Halley and Scarlett and I see a lot of the same emotions in them as I saw in these friends. Many times, I just wanted to hit Halley upside the head for the hurtful things she said to her mom or the way she treated Macon as the best person she’d ever known, only because I’ve seen the way my cousins have lashed out or acted like their friends were better than family. But it also helped me to see their side. In high school, things are crazy. Emotions are all over the place and the only people who really understand what you’re going through are your friends, because they’re going through the same things. They get you.

This is the first book of Dessen’s that I’ve read and I enjoyed it so much, I’m definitely going to pick up more of her books. The story was real and honest, and something I would definitely recommend for a teen or someone who enjoys YA fiction.

What was the last YA fiction book you read?

Book Review: Water For Elephants by Sara Gruen

I’m attending my first book club this month and this was the book on the list. Admittedly, I wasn’t excited. I don’t typically read these types of books and the fact that it has gotten rave reviews turned me off. For some reason, I end up enjoying books most people don’t like. The fact that Megan said it was the “greatest book she’s ever read” and Becky said that she was “hooked from the first paragraph” assured me that I wouldn’t like this book.

Oh. My. Gosh. I was wrong.

Water For Elephants was about a boy named Jacob who joined the circus after his parents died just because he was going to take his tests to certify him as a veterinarian. The story also involves Jacob as an older man, 90 or 93, who is living in a nursing home and reminiscing about his early days with the circus. Younger Jacob quickly becomes the show’s vet, even though he’s technically not certified, where he watches over the flurry of animals for the circus. He befriends a man named August and his wife Marlena, whom Jacob falls hard for. The book follows the progression of Jacob, as he grows up and learns the harsh realities of the world. He learns about love, about hatred, about caring for animals and the strength he has within himself.

I absolutely loved every single page of this book. I fell head over heels for both Younger Jacob and Older Jacob because they both possessed an innate strength and zest for life. Seeing how he grew up as he grew into himself was inspiring.

I thought the plot was fantastic and there weren’t any parts that dragged. Gruen kept it moving the whole time. The dialogue was great and I just loved the development of Jacob and Marlena’s relationship. I hated and loved August, all at the same time.

I can’t pinpoint what I loved most about this book, but I was a little surprised at the ending, simply because of the type of book I thought it was. Others might have thought it predictable, but I didn’t. (This is probably because I read a lot of predictable books and really don’t mind the predictability of them.)

I am really, really excited about the movie adaptation of this book. Robert Pattinson is going to play Younger Jacob, which I think can work. I’m not the biggest Pattinson fan, but he was a little of what I pictured Younger Jacob looked like. Reese Witherspoon is going to play Marlena, which I’m not quite sure about. But since I love Reese, I think she can pull it off!

What did this book teach me? I’m not sure. That I need to give popular books a second chance? ;) I think it taught me about inner strength and that you can’t sit back in life. Cliché as it may be, you really have to make lemonade out of lemons. Jacob was on his way to become a Cornell-educated veterinarian and join his father’s practice. Instead, his parents died and he joined the circus. Yet he still managed to make something out of it and found himself in the process. We don’t know where life will take us, but it’s up to us to make the most out of whatever life hands to us.

Have you read this book? What were your thoughts?


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