Friday, May 28, 2010

Letters to My Future Husband: I'm Impatient


My love,

I'm becoming impatient. I see married friends, friends getting engaged, friends in relationships and I want to know when it will be my turn. When I will meet you. I'm so anxious to meet you, discover who you are, and mesh our lives together. But I know it's not my time yet. I know I am not ready to begin our relationship yet. I know God has set aside a specific time and place for our lives to begin.

I need to keep the focus on God. I have to rediscover my love for Him and find my place in the church again. Our relationship does not stand a chance if we are not both firm on the foundation of Christ. I have seen too many marriages and relationships crumble because of this fact, and I don't want it to happen to us.

I don't see the man I want to be with in any men I meet. I don't find guys who are strong Christians. Every guy I meet falls short of the expectations I have for you. Are my expectations too high? Do I expect too much out of you? Perhaps I do. But I know that Jesus did not call me to live a staid, boring life. He called me to live a life of fulfilled abundance. He wanted me to live a life filled with promise and hope. He wants so much out of my relationship with Him, so I just know in my heart that He wants me to have so much out of a relationship with you.

I know exactly the kind of man I want. I know I am not willing to settle for less than the best for me. I know God is not going to give me what's less than the best for me. I just have to practice patience. I have to keep waiting, keep praying for you. Because I know you're out there, a lily among the thorns. I know you're going to be one of a kind. (To put up with me, you kinda have to be!) And maybe I am expecting too much. But I would rather expect too much and never find it, than to expect too little and end up in a relationship that rips apart my soul.

But I know I'll find you, one day. We'll meet. Maybe we've already met. We'll have our fights and differences. We'll have our laughter and similarities. But it's going to be us against the world, Dear Husband. Because when you capture my heart, which is no easy feat, it's yours forever. There's no giving it back.

I'm impatient, but I'm waiting. I'm waiting on forever. I may be writing these letters for the next 10 years, but I'll patiently write these until I find you.

I can't wait to meet you. I can't wait for our love story to begin. It's going to be one for the record books.

I love you so, so much,

Your Future Wife

13 comments:

  1. This really makes me think of a song I used to love and listen to before I met Dustin. Not sure if you like country music but you should listen to it. It's called "One Day Closer To You" by Carolyn Dawn Johnson.

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  2. You're such an amazing writer. I love reading these.

    Also, love, love, LOVE your new design and blogroll!!! XO

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  3. There you go getting right into my heart again. Stephany I feel like if I were to sit down and write this letter it would look pretty similar to this one. You and I seem to be feeling the same about meeting someone. I am often questioning God and asking him when when when but I know it will all happen in His time, except it is just so hard to wait. But when you wrote that you know that you are not ready to meet him yet because you need to strengthen your relationship with God, oh I can certainly relate to that one... I feel the exact same way.

    Keep pushing through and praying. It is in His plan love. He gives us our heart's desire if they are pure and in good intentions.

    Best,

    Hannah Katy

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  4. I love these. ... Have you heard the song Wait For Me by Rebecca St. James? If not, go iTunes it right now!!

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  5. Be patient!!! I thought I would NEVER meet Mr. Right...I was destined to be the only single one in my group, I even wrote an article that the local newspaper published called, "And Date" about getting invitations to weddings with "and date" on them. Then right after that got published, I met Matt. Funny how things work out!

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  6. Awe. Be patient. I'm trying to deal with this is well. Everyone's getting married, engaged, the whole lot, and I'm now trying to figure out what to do with my shambles of a non-relationship with the guy I thought I was going to marry. So yeah, keep praying, wait, your time will come when it's best for you. Things don't always happen the way we want them to, but that doesn't mean they don't eventually work out 50 times better than expected. God has a cool plan for your life, and trust that he's got it under control. This is my struggle as well sweetie.

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  7. Yes, waiting is challenging. One thing to think about in the meantime: what kind of partner do YOU want to be? I think it's easy to be swept up in what we want our partner to be and then forget that someone who struggles to meet our high expectations will expect the same of us. I'm learning that so much of my own relationship happiness is wrapped up in me being satisfied with myself. Leaning on the other person's awesomeness is exhausting and can lead to neediness. Just keep being the awesome woman that you are!

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  8. 2 things.

    1. I love that you write these letters. it's quite possibly the most romantic thing ever.

    2. I understand your impatience, I feel the same way. Let's stick in there, though! He'll come when it's time :)

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  9. I'm so there with you. It's been almost four years since I've been in a relationship and it's driving me crazy, because I'm sooooooo picky. At the same time, I really, really am ready for somebody to love. We just have to hang in there. One day it'll be our turn to be engaged and in love, and then we'll get to rub it in everybody elses' faces, too, haha. jk Hope you're having a good holiday weekend! :)

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  10. I love these letters. I can't wait for him to read them :) And I definitely agree with Hannah: Keep pushing through and praying. "It is in His plan love. He gives us our heart's desire if they are pure and in good intentions." I couldn't have said it better. <3

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  11. I stumbled upon your blog through Hannah Katy's. I have to agree with what she said, it seems like you read my heart. It is SO comforting to know there are other young women out there who feel the way I do, who have the same questions that I do. Thank you for sharing!
    -Heather

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  12. I felt this exact same way...I didn't have many boyfriends because very rarely did someone meet my very high expectations. I always knew I would have a great love, and then one day out of the blue, I FOUND HIM!! We were married 8 1/2 months later. And I love him more with each passing day. Be patient and remember that song, "you can't hurry love..." Good luck :)

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  13. Completely agree. Waiting for the best guy shows our strength, patience and respect for ourselves. Those are all valiant qualities :)

    *applauds*

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